Private : The Rules of Attraction xiv + xv (A Choice From the Darkside)

Monday, January 28, 2008

Private : The Rules of Attraction xiv Current mood: amorous Category: Music Chains of our memories binds us together On a starlight evening full of bitterness We leave tonight as if it's our last Forgeting the things we did in the past I'd tell you not to forget me but it wouldn't make sense At least tonight we could ride the wind like a second chance Your eyes cut me like a diamond blade as your heart bruises me like a debt that's unpaid. It's our only night we can be together. Until you go back to being his forever. I comfort you with one last kiss until being back into an ingrorant bliss I let you go to him because I know you My hearts desire sometime I'll show you Chorus I'll crush you with the weight of my love and then cut you with the sweetest kisses (The chorus needs to be edited... it's too sour) ________________________________________ Tuesday, January 29, 2008 A Choice From the Darkside : The Rules of Attraction xv Current mood: apathetic Category: Romance and Relationships My last "private" blog entree was about a girl. She already knows who she is. It's private because I know she reads everything I write. Especially the ones I write about attraction. She's the only one that gave me hope. Hope that monogomy might work. I would drop everygirl in the world for her. I did. I did it in hopes she would do the same. But that was just a fools hope. False Hope. I don't want to be "the other guy." But I have to. I suck it up everytime I talk to her because I don't want her to get scarred and run away again. I know I can take more because fear of loss or even of anything doesn't phase me anymore. I wish she could do the same. But she can't. She won't. She doesn't want to. And that's why I don't believe in monogomy anymore. The funny thing is. If she left him, it would taint my belief in monogomy. Because we would start a relationship on something other then what I want. Something I'm trying to avoid. I told my friends about her cause i'm falling for her. Hard. As hard as the concrete I stand on when I think about her. As hard as the way my heart turns cold from rejection. I thought I loved her. But who am I to know what love is? Who am I to judge what love is? Have I ever been in love? I'd like to believe I was once. But that would be a bias opinon only because it's something I WANT to believe in. Not something that's truly true. So I write. I write about her. I live about her. I do it for her. Why? Because of the hope I don't want to believe that's false.